Sometimes we pray for neon signs and God sends us confirmation through a song or a sermon. We don't exactly see that as "an answer". In our minds we wanted God to send a sign with an audible this is the way walk in it, but that is not how it always happens. God gives us our answer in His time and in His way. So our choice is to listen to the whispers aka His answer, or to keep looking for the answer we want in the way we think it should be delivered.
God's been speaking multiple things to me already this year, but the theme/point through them all is to Be who I made you to be. So many times we take on things that God never meant for us to take on, we try to handle things that only God is equipped to handle, and we start running a race that only God can run with us. Stress comes when we try to handle things that only God can handle.
So where does the honest come in for a minute? We all have times during our daily walk that are harder than others to tell our flesh to shush it so we can listen to the whispers. I don't know about you, but I have found that it is so much harder at certain points, because let's be honest our flesh is weaker some days than others. (Girls, you know what I'm talking about....). So being honest, I've craved chocolate more than Him some points and that is never a good thing. God can make us feel so much better than chocolate can and it lasts longer. Our choice is to go to Him first, and then who knows we still may get chocolate later but not because we were stressed but because we wanted something sweet. I digress though. Looking back over the last couple of months, I can point out a certain time period where I know I am weaker than others. So....what to do now. Well God is preparing my heart on that one and I'm sure it will be a blog soon.
God promised that if we seek Him first, everything we need will be added to us. Think on that for a second, He didn't say everything will be given to us, but everything will be added to us. That means when we seek Him first, He will give us what need to keep walking forward. Everything we need to tell the mountain we may be facing to move we already posses. So choose to be the one He called you to be. Be You ;-)
I've been telling God my heart a lot lately and watching Him peel back layers. Things I that I used to think mattered, don't matter any more. People who I placed as a priority, aren't exactly that any more. Opinions and voices of others that I let consume my thoughts are slowly losing their voice and place(this one is harder). Issues that used to not prick my heart and cause tears, do now. Sensitive now maybe, but it could also be called as broken. (I'm also pretty sure at some point I asked God for a broken heart for things that break His heart, but that's another blog). Priorities are changing and that's okay. With that though comes change and sometimes that isn't always as easy or as comfortable. Changes stretch us, make us look inside, and make us realize who we are. So many times we let others tell us who we are that we start believing what they say about us instead of what God says about us. We let how others see us cloud out how He sees us and therefore how we should see ourselves. (Look in the mirror and think for a second, do you critique yourself based on what others may say or think or what you think). We have taken on way more "stress" than He ever intended because we have taken on too much of what others say/think. I've been watching God take the pieces that I have scattered around in my "life" and watching Him slowly put them into place. God has called us to be where we are for a reason and He wants us to be content there. He wants us to in essence bloom where we are planted and be His Hands and Feet. God didn't call us to do what someone else has done, play the part someone else has played, but to be ourselves. Do what you know in your heart you should do, and God will take care of the rest. As the Laura Story song says, Be My God so I can just be me.
Honestly, I'm learning the times when I am stronger in Him and the times when I'm not. Realizing when those are helps me to be a better me by leaning on Him more during those times when I know I am not as strong. Feelings are a part of you but not who you are. Run to Him with those and let Him be the One to sort them out. I'm not perfect, I'm just a princess of the Most High who has finally gotten tired of doing what others want and trying to be who other people want me to be. I'm a Princess who has learned that God loves me for me and has an amazing plan for my life. It's not exactly how I "thought" it would be at this point in my life, but His ways are so much higher than mine.
Until next time,
~Melissa
Monday, January 20, 2014
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Self-discipline, power, will......whatever you want to call it
Well it is 12 days into the new year and some things are moving toward the new and some things are still stuck in the past. Why do we give in so easily? Why do we let our flesh dictate feelings and actions? Why do we rationalize that we can't say no when in reality we can. Before I go too far, read all the way through. I'm not getting deep, just practical.
So why do we say yes to the sweets when we know we have the power to say no?
Why do we say yes to getting upset about something someone did or said when we have the power to forgive and move on?
Why do we do we try to please everyone when all God said was be yourself?
Why do we speak what we should keep to ourselves?
Why do we do what we know we shouldn't instead of what we should?
God has given us the power to look at the mountain and say move. The mountain could be some crisis or simply saying no to a snack that's not healthy.
Be a difference maker in 2014. Let God take over you, all of you. Give Him your will("your way" of doing things, "your way" of thinking about things, and "your way" of going through life.). Don't miss the God moments, the whispers, and the quiet times where God reveals how the pieces all fit together.
Challenged and determined that this year will be different. Looking to be fruitful, not just busy.....
Until next time,
~Melissa
So why do we say yes to the sweets when we know we have the power to say no?
Why do we say yes to getting upset about something someone did or said when we have the power to forgive and move on?
Why do we do we try to please everyone when all God said was be yourself?
Why do we speak what we should keep to ourselves?
Why do we do what we know we shouldn't instead of what we should?
God has given us the power to look at the mountain and say move. The mountain could be some crisis or simply saying no to a snack that's not healthy.
Be a difference maker in 2014. Let God take over you, all of you. Give Him your will("your way" of doing things, "your way" of thinking about things, and "your way" of going through life.). Don't miss the God moments, the whispers, and the quiet times where God reveals how the pieces all fit together.
Challenged and determined that this year will be different. Looking to be fruitful, not just busy.....
Until next time,
~Melissa
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
2014....a new year, a new season
Well I didn't realize how long it had been since I blogged, but I have been writing in my journal a lot, so you know what that means...yep blogs are on their way in time. For now though here is the typical new year post in typical Melissa style.
2013 was a year of learning. It was a year filled with God pulling back the layers of my heart, my mind, and my life, and showing me more of Himself. It was a year of chiseling and shaping me to be like Him. I wish I could say I listened the first time, but sadly it wasn't that easy. Some of these lessons were learned on the mountain easily walking with Him, but most were learned on my knees stuck in a spot determined to not move until He said something. I am determined more than ever for this new year to put into practice and apply what I learned in 2013. I don't want to find myself going around those mountains ever again. For that to happen though, it's time to stay focused and to daily stay in touch with Him(make that hourly). God has an incredible plan in store and I feel like the best is still to come. I'm at a turning point in my life. Go this way and follow the path others want or go this way and follow what He wants. The choice isn't always easy, but only one leads to happiness. God gave me a picture of where I'm at for this season. This is a walk on the water season. Some points in our journey we find ourselves in the boat. We know God wants us in the boat, but then the storm starts. Instead of paying attention to the One who put us in the boat, we pay attention to the storm(aka circumstances/situations going around us). Then out of fear(or even frustration), we call out and see Him on the water. Well remember what happened when Peter stepped out of the boat? He was able to walk as long as he kept His eyes on Jesus. Sometimes God says get out of the boat now and let's walk. This is the part of our journey where trust is vital. We have to keep our eyes and our focus on Him or else we will start to sink and the cares of this world will over take us. I love the part of the verse after Jesus talked to Peter about having faith and they got back into the boat, because it says then they went to the other side. See sometimes the bridge between one season and the next is a walking on the water time. I'm excited with anticipation for 2014. I've never been more ready to see what God has in store and where He is going to take me. I'm ready for the journey.
So wherever you find yourself on your journey we start this new year, stay focused. God has a plan that only He knows about and only He can help bring to complete. Trust Him and walk forward.
Until next time,
~Melissa
Make a difference for Him in 2014!
Lessons learned from 2013:
2013 was a year of learning. It was a year filled with God pulling back the layers of my heart, my mind, and my life, and showing me more of Himself. It was a year of chiseling and shaping me to be like Him. I wish I could say I listened the first time, but sadly it wasn't that easy. Some of these lessons were learned on the mountain easily walking with Him, but most were learned on my knees stuck in a spot determined to not move until He said something. I am determined more than ever for this new year to put into practice and apply what I learned in 2013. I don't want to find myself going around those mountains ever again. For that to happen though, it's time to stay focused and to daily stay in touch with Him(make that hourly). God has an incredible plan in store and I feel like the best is still to come. I'm at a turning point in my life. Go this way and follow the path others want or go this way and follow what He wants. The choice isn't always easy, but only one leads to happiness. God gave me a picture of where I'm at for this season. This is a walk on the water season. Some points in our journey we find ourselves in the boat. We know God wants us in the boat, but then the storm starts. Instead of paying attention to the One who put us in the boat, we pay attention to the storm(aka circumstances/situations going around us). Then out of fear(or even frustration), we call out and see Him on the water. Well remember what happened when Peter stepped out of the boat? He was able to walk as long as he kept His eyes on Jesus. Sometimes God says get out of the boat now and let's walk. This is the part of our journey where trust is vital. We have to keep our eyes and our focus on Him or else we will start to sink and the cares of this world will over take us. I love the part of the verse after Jesus talked to Peter about having faith and they got back into the boat, because it says then they went to the other side. See sometimes the bridge between one season and the next is a walking on the water time. I'm excited with anticipation for 2014. I've never been more ready to see what God has in store and where He is going to take me. I'm ready for the journey.
So wherever you find yourself on your journey we start this new year, stay focused. God has a plan that only He knows about and only He can help bring to complete. Trust Him and walk forward.
Until next time,
~Melissa
Make a difference for Him in 2014!
Lessons learned from 2013:
- I've learned the difference between friend and acquaintance. Know the difference and save yourself some time.
- I've learned God will make you rest if you don't listen when He says to. (Advice listen first, it's cheaper than co-pays).
- I've learned that people will try and change you if you let them. Be the you He made you to be and be happy with that.
- I've learned that little things do matter and sometimes they mean more to people than the Big things.
- I've learned that you make a difference to some just by being you. You may not always see it, but the impact is there.
- I've learned that neon signs do not always happen. Must listen for whispers and look for footprints.
- I've learned that no is a great two letter word that I must say more often.
- I've learned that the enemy will sow doubt when God answers a prayer. Trust that God knows your heart. When He answers walk in faith and tell the enemy to hush.
These are just a few. I'll post more later in some other blogs I'm sure. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Remember what He has done in the past only to encourage you to keep moving forward in the future. So many times we keep talking about what God did for us or how He used us in the past. I am thankful for how He has used me, but I look forward to and eagerly await the ways He will use me in the future. I leave you with a video/song from Matthew West. It may be my new theme song for 2014....we'll see.
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Conversations with God
Those who know me will totally understand this blog, if you don't know me....read to the end before making any judgments. God and I have a unique relationship. He knows me well enough to know He has to be blunt sometimes and sometimes it takes more than once to get it into my head. (I'm stubborn sometimes ;-))
"Worry about what I worry about.": Worry is not from God, hear me on that, but when He said this last week I had to do some thinking. So many times we let our concerns turn into worry, but how many times do we let our concerns turn into action. How many times do we actually spend time worrying about something that we can change? Basically God was saying with this, it's okay to be concerned about something....but be concerned about what concerns Him. Can you change the way people treat you? No sadly you can't. Can you change the way you treat others? Yes you can. Don't let how others treat you keep you so down that you can't do your part and love the ones He brings into your path. God brings people into your path that you are meant to impact and some that are meant to impact you. Know the difference and let the naysayers go in one ear and out the other. If you are going to spend time "concerned" about things, be concerned about the lost. Be concerned about the kids who may wake up without Christmas. Be concerned about the things God can use you to change. One day we are all going to stand before Him and give an account of how we spent our day. I think we all may be surprised that some of things that consume our days won't be what He asks about.
"Give me that target you feel like is on your back.": If we have up our shield of faith and are moving forward, we will feel like there is a target on our back. The enemy is scared to death of any saint who is walking forward in faith, because he knows what God can do with a faith walking believer. Only God can take a target on your back that the enemy is using for shooting practice and use it for your good. Remember God's got your back covered as long as you are moving forward, nothing can touch you without going through Him. As tough as it may seem, He has a plan! Keep moving forward ;-)
"Remember what you pray about." I'm not going to say much about this one right now, because it is a blog for another day. I will say this, sometimes we pray and ask God for help with something. Then when He doesn't answer right away, we forget about it and just consider it a no answer. WELL....God may have answered not just yet or wait awhile. Sometimes the things we complain about are things we have prayed for.
"Regardless of how you feel, I've got this!" I think this was my favorite conversation of all. So many times we are beaten down by the world and by others, that we just need a minute to breathe some air back into us. He is waiting to breathe that breath if we just take a minute, stop, and ask Him for it. He knows what we need, but He is not going to chase us down to do it. God is going to use each "knife in the back", each footprint where you have been walked on, basically each hurt for your good if you let Him. You can't carry this all by yourself and don't try. God knows your heart better than anyone, let Him take the heavy stuff, so you can keep running the race. God will take care of those who have stepped on and stuck a knife in your back.(Remember the Biblical truth of sowing and reaping). God also has an amazing way of giving you insight to see why some people are the way they are. Love when He says love, and just show them Jesus! He will take care of the rest.
These are just a few snippets from some conversations God and I have had recently. As I said in the beginning, He has a way of bluntly reminding me of a few things. I love though how His loving way is still gentle and full of grace. Oh get this if you don't get anything else on the blog....His grace covers and restores when the world as left you wondering where you fit. He has it all under control. Trust doesn't mean we can see the next step, it's that we take the next step knowing He has paved the way. Thought for this month of being thankful and this holiday season that is upon us: Love people. Everyone is out there just wanting to know that someone cares, that they make a difference, and that someone thinks they are special. Make it happen for someone else and God will make it happen for you!
Enjoying the journey,
~Melissa
"Worry about what I worry about.": Worry is not from God, hear me on that, but when He said this last week I had to do some thinking. So many times we let our concerns turn into worry, but how many times do we let our concerns turn into action. How many times do we actually spend time worrying about something that we can change? Basically God was saying with this, it's okay to be concerned about something....but be concerned about what concerns Him. Can you change the way people treat you? No sadly you can't. Can you change the way you treat others? Yes you can. Don't let how others treat you keep you so down that you can't do your part and love the ones He brings into your path. God brings people into your path that you are meant to impact and some that are meant to impact you. Know the difference and let the naysayers go in one ear and out the other. If you are going to spend time "concerned" about things, be concerned about the lost. Be concerned about the kids who may wake up without Christmas. Be concerned about the things God can use you to change. One day we are all going to stand before Him and give an account of how we spent our day. I think we all may be surprised that some of things that consume our days won't be what He asks about.
"Give me that target you feel like is on your back.": If we have up our shield of faith and are moving forward, we will feel like there is a target on our back. The enemy is scared to death of any saint who is walking forward in faith, because he knows what God can do with a faith walking believer. Only God can take a target on your back that the enemy is using for shooting practice and use it for your good. Remember God's got your back covered as long as you are moving forward, nothing can touch you without going through Him. As tough as it may seem, He has a plan! Keep moving forward ;-)
"Remember what you pray about." I'm not going to say much about this one right now, because it is a blog for another day. I will say this, sometimes we pray and ask God for help with something. Then when He doesn't answer right away, we forget about it and just consider it a no answer. WELL....God may have answered not just yet or wait awhile. Sometimes the things we complain about are things we have prayed for.
"Regardless of how you feel, I've got this!" I think this was my favorite conversation of all. So many times we are beaten down by the world and by others, that we just need a minute to breathe some air back into us. He is waiting to breathe that breath if we just take a minute, stop, and ask Him for it. He knows what we need, but He is not going to chase us down to do it. God is going to use each "knife in the back", each footprint where you have been walked on, basically each hurt for your good if you let Him. You can't carry this all by yourself and don't try. God knows your heart better than anyone, let Him take the heavy stuff, so you can keep running the race. God will take care of those who have stepped on and stuck a knife in your back.(Remember the Biblical truth of sowing and reaping). God also has an amazing way of giving you insight to see why some people are the way they are. Love when He says love, and just show them Jesus! He will take care of the rest.
These are just a few snippets from some conversations God and I have had recently. As I said in the beginning, He has a way of bluntly reminding me of a few things. I love though how His loving way is still gentle and full of grace. Oh get this if you don't get anything else on the blog....His grace covers and restores when the world as left you wondering where you fit. He has it all under control. Trust doesn't mean we can see the next step, it's that we take the next step knowing He has paved the way. Thought for this month of being thankful and this holiday season that is upon us: Love people. Everyone is out there just wanting to know that someone cares, that they make a difference, and that someone thinks they are special. Make it happen for someone else and God will make it happen for you!
Enjoying the journey,
~Melissa
Sunday, October 27, 2013
From the pages of my heart....
More lessons learned from last week.....
There is a shift in the air. Things are changing, there is more of the mountain behind me than in front of me. The chains of people pleasing are falling to the ground. At the end of the day, He is the only one that we have to please and make happy. The best thing about that is, He knows our hearts and can see what others cannot see. Too many times we walk around on egg shells. We keep to ourselves when God says to share a word. We could encourage someone, but what would that person think or say? We could be His hands and Feet, but what will happen when someone slaps our hands or stomps on our feet? Time to move past what others think and follow through what He says to do period.
Some moments along the journey aren't easy. Some are rest stops, some take your breath away, and some restore and refresh you so that you can keep walking this journey. God is bigger than it all and My God has got it all under control ;-)
Giving Him glory each step of the journey!
~Melissa
- People will hurt you once. You are the one that keeps letting them do it again and again. Hit delete on words/actions and distance yourself from those who are only going to put a knife in your back. You can love from a distance.
- The hardest thing to ever do is pray for those that hurt you. When you do though, you come out on top and the power the enemy has to control you with those thoughts weakens.
- Know the battle you are facing and who it is you are really fighting. The enemy is seeking whom he may devour and he uses things/people you would least expect to get to you. Recognize that and move on.
- If the devil is on your back, it means he is scared of what you can do. Take that as compliment and STAND. Stand and let God fight the battle.
- When it is all said and done, God is not going to ask me about paperwork. He is going to ask me about my time spent with people.
There is a shift in the air. Things are changing, there is more of the mountain behind me than in front of me. The chains of people pleasing are falling to the ground. At the end of the day, He is the only one that we have to please and make happy. The best thing about that is, He knows our hearts and can see what others cannot see. Too many times we walk around on egg shells. We keep to ourselves when God says to share a word. We could encourage someone, but what would that person think or say? We could be His hands and Feet, but what will happen when someone slaps our hands or stomps on our feet? Time to move past what others think and follow through what He says to do period.
Some moments along the journey aren't easy. Some are rest stops, some take your breath away, and some restore and refresh you so that you can keep walking this journey. God is bigger than it all and My God has got it all under control ;-)
Giving Him glory each step of the journey!
~Melissa
Saturday, October 26, 2013
The enemy did NOT win this week
This has been a week that probably should have multiple blogs coming from it, but I'm going to try and focus on just one for now. The enemy is not going to win this battle. He's just not. Apparently I scare him and make him uneasy. Why else would he try to do everything he could to throw me off course?
The enemy can't touch a Child of God, but he can get to you through people around you. He can use those people to cause you to doubt yourself, to feel discouraged, to feel like you can't make a difference, and to just have a good ole pity party. If you open the door and let those thoughts play in your heart and mind, he's won. The enemy can use your feelings and emotions to paralyze you to where you are no heavenly good. That's his goal otherwise he would just ignore you and move on.
The enemy will try and what he throws at you may knock you down for a minute, make you cry, and make your heart feel like it is broken. Take a deep breath, throw this on God, delete those thoughts, and stand up. You may not feel like moving forward just yet, but in time you will and before you know it you will be running this race again. Where we mess up is that we don't hit delete quick enough and we don't throw it on God as early as we should. We let others words and/or actions play around in our mind and heart until we feel defeated and broken. Accept God's grace, delete the words of the enemy, and listen to His truth. Then and only then can you stand up and move forward. God will use the attack to make you stronger. He will open your eyes to people around you who are stepping on you and who the enemy may be using to keep you down. Trust what He shows you, write those truths on your heart, pray for them, but be on guard.
So where is all this coming from? Well the enemy has been after me this week. In fact, it is almost like he has attempted to launch an all out war. See he loves to throw it at you one right after another. His goal was to keep me defeated and discouraged....guess what he's a liar by the way and does not win. See I know who I am in Christ. Yes, I have felt broken by the events of the week, but it has not crushed me. My feelings have been hurt and the knife in the back has been turned, but God is bigger than all of that. See only God can take what the enemy means for evil and turn it around for His good. Only God can take those moments when you feel two inches tall due to others words and actions and use it to remind you Who you are to Him. God's grace covers it all and He can take care of everything. He can re-inflate what the world has deflated. He can breathe life where there is doubt. He can send encouragement where there is discouragement. We just have to let Him.
I would not have made it through this week without the prayers of some precious few. They have been a lifeline over the years and when I send out a prayer text, they start praying. Their prayers breathed life back into me. I was able to move forward and replace the discouragement with the truth of Who He said I am. See the world wants nothing more than for you to believe what it says about you....DON'T!! God is going to raise up a standard and take care of those who speak ill about you, believe it and stand on His truth. God has a word for you that the enemy didn't want you to hear. God has pieces of your puzzle to show you, that the enemy doesn't want you to have. God has a light for your fire, that the enemy wanted to extinguish. God has a plan and a purpose for you that the enemy hopes you never know. God has a word for you that the enemy doesn't want you to hear.
The enemy doesn't win. Believe me when I say that. You may feel broke, discouraged, and questioning whether or not you can do anything right at all....trust me sweet reader, YOU CAN! Greater is He that is in you, then he that is in the world! The world may step on you, but God is going to allow you to step up and out! Defeat is a tool the enemy uses. You are a child of the Most High, a royal prince or princess...there is no condemnation for you. Believe what He says and delete the rest ;-)
When it is all said and done, it only matters about hearing Him say well done. There are things we spend our lives doing and putting a great importance on, that when we stand before Him one day will not be something He asks about. (That's a blog for another day...). I'm going through this mountain, not because I'm anything...but because He is everything!
Until next time,
~Melissa
The enemy can't touch a Child of God, but he can get to you through people around you. He can use those people to cause you to doubt yourself, to feel discouraged, to feel like you can't make a difference, and to just have a good ole pity party. If you open the door and let those thoughts play in your heart and mind, he's won. The enemy can use your feelings and emotions to paralyze you to where you are no heavenly good. That's his goal otherwise he would just ignore you and move on.
The enemy will try and what he throws at you may knock you down for a minute, make you cry, and make your heart feel like it is broken. Take a deep breath, throw this on God, delete those thoughts, and stand up. You may not feel like moving forward just yet, but in time you will and before you know it you will be running this race again. Where we mess up is that we don't hit delete quick enough and we don't throw it on God as early as we should. We let others words and/or actions play around in our mind and heart until we feel defeated and broken. Accept God's grace, delete the words of the enemy, and listen to His truth. Then and only then can you stand up and move forward. God will use the attack to make you stronger. He will open your eyes to people around you who are stepping on you and who the enemy may be using to keep you down. Trust what He shows you, write those truths on your heart, pray for them, but be on guard.
So where is all this coming from? Well the enemy has been after me this week. In fact, it is almost like he has attempted to launch an all out war. See he loves to throw it at you one right after another. His goal was to keep me defeated and discouraged....guess what he's a liar by the way and does not win. See I know who I am in Christ. Yes, I have felt broken by the events of the week, but it has not crushed me. My feelings have been hurt and the knife in the back has been turned, but God is bigger than all of that. See only God can take what the enemy means for evil and turn it around for His good. Only God can take those moments when you feel two inches tall due to others words and actions and use it to remind you Who you are to Him. God's grace covers it all and He can take care of everything. He can re-inflate what the world has deflated. He can breathe life where there is doubt. He can send encouragement where there is discouragement. We just have to let Him.
I would not have made it through this week without the prayers of some precious few. They have been a lifeline over the years and when I send out a prayer text, they start praying. Their prayers breathed life back into me. I was able to move forward and replace the discouragement with the truth of Who He said I am. See the world wants nothing more than for you to believe what it says about you....DON'T!! God is going to raise up a standard and take care of those who speak ill about you, believe it and stand on His truth. God has a word for you that the enemy didn't want you to hear. God has pieces of your puzzle to show you, that the enemy doesn't want you to have. God has a light for your fire, that the enemy wanted to extinguish. God has a plan and a purpose for you that the enemy hopes you never know. God has a word for you that the enemy doesn't want you to hear.
The enemy doesn't win. Believe me when I say that. You may feel broke, discouraged, and questioning whether or not you can do anything right at all....trust me sweet reader, YOU CAN! Greater is He that is in you, then he that is in the world! The world may step on you, but God is going to allow you to step up and out! Defeat is a tool the enemy uses. You are a child of the Most High, a royal prince or princess...there is no condemnation for you. Believe what He says and delete the rest ;-)
When it is all said and done, it only matters about hearing Him say well done. There are things we spend our lives doing and putting a great importance on, that when we stand before Him one day will not be something He asks about. (That's a blog for another day...). I'm going through this mountain, not because I'm anything...but because He is everything!
Until next time,
~Melissa
Saturday, October 19, 2013
From the pages of my heart
I've decided that from time to time you may see a post titled this "From the pages of my heart". The posts will have meat, but it will be woven within just what I said...my heart. I have previously called these "Just thinking" posts, but I feel like it is better said with from the pages of my heart. So here goes this one :-)
I've been stepped on, questioned, looked over, and made to feel like I am two inches tall way too much. Why do I take things so personal and let what I do impact how I see me? Only God knows. I climbed the mountain of people pleasing and there sat the feelings mountain. I'm convinced that is not a mountain I can climb. See some mountains are meant for us to climb, some are meant for God to move, and some He means for us to go through. I have asked, begged, implored Him to move this mountain. I'm tired of being hurt and having people look down on me. He finally said, this is a mountain you are going through. I did have to ask Him why. See sometimes the lesson is not taught until we walk through it. Can you imagine the Israelites crossing the Red Sea? Would they have still felt the same way if God hadn't parted the Red Sea and simply took them around the Sea? No when we go through something, it is for God to yet again show out as only He can. So through the mountain we go.
At some point, you have to separate your who from your do. Your do is your job etc., your who is who you are. Sometimes we get the two mixed up and let our do make us feel bad about ourselves. Keep doing what you are doing and pressing forward with Him. The law of sowing and reaping is biblical and His word never returns void. Be faithful with what He has called you to do and one day, He will put you in charge of a much larger thing. For years I prayed for God to give me favor and opportunities within a certain aspect of my life. Over the past couple of years, He has begun to open door outside of the inner circle for that part of my life. I finally started to see, I had been praying for God to move in my fish bowl and God was giving me an ocean to swim in. God will always answer our prayers, just not in the way we necessarily expect Him too. When He gives you the ocean, move on from the fish bowl. One day you will turn that puzzle piece over, the one that you have tried so hard to squeeze into a certain spot, and realize it doesn't fit the puzzle you were trying to put it into.
God has given everyone talents and abilities. If you are doing what He has called you to do, people are going to question and attack you. Not because they realize what they are doing, but because the enemy is using them to fire away at the target on your back. My heart is huge, that's a part of who I am. I can see the good in most and I look at people as more than just a number. I asked God for the ability to see others through His eyes, and let me tell you that has not been easy. While my flesh gets frustrated with the way someone has treated me, my Spirit sees the bigger picture. Does it make things easier? Not yet. My flesh still gets me in trouble and my mouth wants to run to the defense of me, but that's not something I can do. This is bigger than me, so I must defer to the One who can handle anything that comes His way. One day I will respond with just my Spirit and not my flesh, but I'm a work in progress.
The task that has been set before me this year is one of impossible proportions. My God though likes to work when things are impossible. I've seen Him do it more than once, the only difference this time is it is a journey not a sprint. The impossible times before have been short sprints, one where the deadline/end time was in the near future. This year the impossible task is a little more lengthy, and more of a marathon instead of a sprint. God's got it though, He just has to keep reminding me of that over and over.
If have learned something on this first leg of the journey, it is this....I am thankful for those who see me for me and love me that way. I'm thankful for those who have taken time to get to know me. Not the me I try to put on for others to play the part they have requested, but the me that is who I am. I'm tired of wearing masks just so someone will be happy. I'm tired of people trying to fit me in a box that meets their expectations. I am who He says I am...not anyone else. I am a Princess of the Most High. I first had that encounter when I worked at WorldSong and I have never let go of that precious truth....I am a Princess because my Daddy is the King of Kings. I'm someone who grew up with incredible examples of teachers who cared. These were teachers who were there because they wanted to be and who saw us as who were, not just a number. I grew up with teachers who took time to get to know their students and to build that relationship that made us want to do well in their classes, because we knew they cared about us. That was the foundation I had and why I wanted to be a teacher. I felt God calling me to the public school system to be that kind of teacher to my students. That is why I do what I do and why I care the way I do. I've been at this teaching journey for 8 years now. I do not by any means know everything there is to know, but I have learned more than some will ever realize. I read and research what I do not know, and I find ways to apply what I learn. I then take and share that with others through my Professional Learning Network. Why did I say all of that...because I am a teacher too. I may not have a classroom of my own, but I have expertise that some will never tap into because they have labeled me and cannot get past the label. Lesson in that: Every person has something to offer, take time to listen and you may just learn something new. Labels are for food products to tell you what's inside. Labels are not meant for humans, because it takes time to know what's on the inside. I am someone who has seen God move in her life in ways that I can't put into words. My relationship with God has developed so much over the last 15 years that I still look back with mouth wide open. I've seen Him take two of the worst days of my life and use it for my good. I've seen Him build relationships that I still thank Him for daily. I've seen Him take a little girl who spent a good part of her life being a Martha, develop into someone who just wants to sit at His feet and be a Mary. I've learned to quit looking for Him in the earthquakes, and to treasure His whispers. I'll share some more on those moments along the journey in later from the heart posts.
This blog went longer than expected, but I hope you were able to take a peek inside my heart for just a few minutes. I am so much more than what you may see. Thank you to those that have taken the time get to know the real me. You are a part of this incredible journey and I am grateful for you. To those who haven't, I've learned you are a part of this journey as well. For God has used you to rub off these rough edges, to continue to burn off some flesh, and to refine me until He can see His reflection. I do not fit in a box, God doesn't work like that. I know who I am in Him and the next part of this journey looks to be amazing! Together He and I are going through this mountain and I can already see through to the other side.
Until next time,
Enjoy the journey!
~Melissa
I've been stepped on, questioned, looked over, and made to feel like I am two inches tall way too much. Why do I take things so personal and let what I do impact how I see me? Only God knows. I climbed the mountain of people pleasing and there sat the feelings mountain. I'm convinced that is not a mountain I can climb. See some mountains are meant for us to climb, some are meant for God to move, and some He means for us to go through. I have asked, begged, implored Him to move this mountain. I'm tired of being hurt and having people look down on me. He finally said, this is a mountain you are going through. I did have to ask Him why. See sometimes the lesson is not taught until we walk through it. Can you imagine the Israelites crossing the Red Sea? Would they have still felt the same way if God hadn't parted the Red Sea and simply took them around the Sea? No when we go through something, it is for God to yet again show out as only He can. So through the mountain we go.
At some point, you have to separate your who from your do. Your do is your job etc., your who is who you are. Sometimes we get the two mixed up and let our do make us feel bad about ourselves. Keep doing what you are doing and pressing forward with Him. The law of sowing and reaping is biblical and His word never returns void. Be faithful with what He has called you to do and one day, He will put you in charge of a much larger thing. For years I prayed for God to give me favor and opportunities within a certain aspect of my life. Over the past couple of years, He has begun to open door outside of the inner circle for that part of my life. I finally started to see, I had been praying for God to move in my fish bowl and God was giving me an ocean to swim in. God will always answer our prayers, just not in the way we necessarily expect Him too. When He gives you the ocean, move on from the fish bowl. One day you will turn that puzzle piece over, the one that you have tried so hard to squeeze into a certain spot, and realize it doesn't fit the puzzle you were trying to put it into.
God has given everyone talents and abilities. If you are doing what He has called you to do, people are going to question and attack you. Not because they realize what they are doing, but because the enemy is using them to fire away at the target on your back. My heart is huge, that's a part of who I am. I can see the good in most and I look at people as more than just a number. I asked God for the ability to see others through His eyes, and let me tell you that has not been easy. While my flesh gets frustrated with the way someone has treated me, my Spirit sees the bigger picture. Does it make things easier? Not yet. My flesh still gets me in trouble and my mouth wants to run to the defense of me, but that's not something I can do. This is bigger than me, so I must defer to the One who can handle anything that comes His way. One day I will respond with just my Spirit and not my flesh, but I'm a work in progress.
The task that has been set before me this year is one of impossible proportions. My God though likes to work when things are impossible. I've seen Him do it more than once, the only difference this time is it is a journey not a sprint. The impossible times before have been short sprints, one where the deadline/end time was in the near future. This year the impossible task is a little more lengthy, and more of a marathon instead of a sprint. God's got it though, He just has to keep reminding me of that over and over.
If have learned something on this first leg of the journey, it is this....I am thankful for those who see me for me and love me that way. I'm thankful for those who have taken time to get to know me. Not the me I try to put on for others to play the part they have requested, but the me that is who I am. I'm tired of wearing masks just so someone will be happy. I'm tired of people trying to fit me in a box that meets their expectations. I am who He says I am...not anyone else. I am a Princess of the Most High. I first had that encounter when I worked at WorldSong and I have never let go of that precious truth....I am a Princess because my Daddy is the King of Kings. I'm someone who grew up with incredible examples of teachers who cared. These were teachers who were there because they wanted to be and who saw us as who were, not just a number. I grew up with teachers who took time to get to know their students and to build that relationship that made us want to do well in their classes, because we knew they cared about us. That was the foundation I had and why I wanted to be a teacher. I felt God calling me to the public school system to be that kind of teacher to my students. That is why I do what I do and why I care the way I do. I've been at this teaching journey for 8 years now. I do not by any means know everything there is to know, but I have learned more than some will ever realize. I read and research what I do not know, and I find ways to apply what I learn. I then take and share that with others through my Professional Learning Network. Why did I say all of that...because I am a teacher too. I may not have a classroom of my own, but I have expertise that some will never tap into because they have labeled me and cannot get past the label. Lesson in that: Every person has something to offer, take time to listen and you may just learn something new. Labels are for food products to tell you what's inside. Labels are not meant for humans, because it takes time to know what's on the inside. I am someone who has seen God move in her life in ways that I can't put into words. My relationship with God has developed so much over the last 15 years that I still look back with mouth wide open. I've seen Him take two of the worst days of my life and use it for my good. I've seen Him build relationships that I still thank Him for daily. I've seen Him take a little girl who spent a good part of her life being a Martha, develop into someone who just wants to sit at His feet and be a Mary. I've learned to quit looking for Him in the earthquakes, and to treasure His whispers. I'll share some more on those moments along the journey in later from the heart posts.
This blog went longer than expected, but I hope you were able to take a peek inside my heart for just a few minutes. I am so much more than what you may see. Thank you to those that have taken the time get to know the real me. You are a part of this incredible journey and I am grateful for you. To those who haven't, I've learned you are a part of this journey as well. For God has used you to rub off these rough edges, to continue to burn off some flesh, and to refine me until He can see His reflection. I do not fit in a box, God doesn't work like that. I know who I am in Him and the next part of this journey looks to be amazing! Together He and I are going through this mountain and I can already see through to the other side.
Until next time,
Enjoy the journey!
~Melissa
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