Monday I knew pulling into work today that I was going to have to get gas after work. My light wasn't on, but the screen in the middle of my dashboard said 74 miles to E. I knew with running the air conditioner, that wouldn't take long. Oh how the natural reflects the spiritual more than I realized....
There is not a battle without a fight, a victory without a struggle, or a shout without a promise. I finally got still...I finally heard what He's probably been trying to tell me all day. The word He spoke through a friend yesterday, connected to the day I've had today (draining as it was), all leading back to a picture from His word.
The enemy knows the impact we are making, he knows our reach more than we do and does what he can to keep our eyes focused on everything but what we can be doing for God. It's not about feeling, if that were the case..I would have taken a half day today, ran to my bed, and declared no more adulting today. It's not about feelings though...while it's important to recognize how we are feeling.....it's not who we are. Empty happens, the enemy does that on purpose....he must forget about how far we can go on the gas light while finding the filing station.
I started this blog on Monday and I honestly was hoping God would just fill my tank and not finish it. Empty is a hard place to be...it's at empty that you realize one of two choices have to be made...trust or doubt. Trust that God is going to keep you going even when you don't feel like it or don't want to anymore, or doubt that paralyzes you in place. Your reach and impact are at a standstill when you are standing still.
The disciples on the boat didn't realize they were headed into the storm, but Jesus did...and He chose to sleep. He knew He had control of the storm because of Who His Father was. Guess what child of God, the same goes for you? Focus on Whose you are when the world wants to tell you otherwise. Greater things are still to come. ..He promised.
The widow woman baked a cake for Elijah even though she knew she was on empty. Empty happens....but it's what you do on empty that determines how long you can keep pouring. Obedience may not make sense...but it's one step in front of the other knowing He's a Good Good Father and has your steps ordered.
While this week has had some amazing God moments that have made me smile, cry, and shout....there have been moments of wanting to crawl in bed and just pull the covers over my head as well. This time of the year is overwhelming. ...it just is. At one point today, I said if I slowed down I would cry because there just wasn't enough of me to go around. The truth in all that was God knew it all along....He knows when the tears need to happen and when He needs to whisper you are more than enough. In the midst of the moments of discouragement God has whispered encouragement and truth....He is the restorer of our souls. So many times we want Him to answer our prayers in a certain way, but He has more planned than we can even imagine. My natural may be exhausted, but my spirtual can see that God is doing what He does best and pouring even when I am on empty.
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