I'm always real, but for most of my posts I focus on what He has said etc. This post may be a little different.
I'm pretty sure the last six weeks would be called a boot camp of some sorts. I've learned more than I could ever put on paper. I'm a lot lighter(not literally, but in other ways) because I have finally dropped a few things that were keeping me from running the race He has set before me. I was starting to become convinced that I was a marathon sprinter. I would take off running trying to keep up with those in the lanes to the sides forgetting what the real prize was. I was more concerned with the crowd than the finish line. In life, no one can take off running a marathon without training first. I'm finally looking at the end of training and ready to start jogging on this journey with Him.
Lessons have finally sank in, and application time has arrived. So here is to the week ahead, the journey ahead as the application process starts.
It takes time to realize that its okay for everyone not to like you. Accept that truth and move on. Spend time with those who love you for you and not necessarily what you do. Friends love you, acquaintances love what you can do for them. There is a difference and not learning it will cost you.
True friends are few and far between. They will be there always and will love you know matter what. God friends are the ones who pour into you as much as you pour into them. They make you a better you. Jesus had lots of acquaintances, but only a few close friends. There is a lesson in that.
When you ask God for wisdom, and He answers that request....USE IT!!! He didn't reveal things to you and give you discernment for this season just so you can keep trying to run the popular race and please everyone. He gave you that wisdom to take you to a new level, so you would see with His eyes why some do what they do. So you would see a bigger picture and could know how to guard your heart. So you would realize that time spent with some people is not productive as it breeds negativity, doubt, and just plain flesh issues. When He says to do something....DO IT! He is not going to move a mountain you are trying to climb. So when you ask Him for help, take it and apply it. God doesn't always change the situation, but I am living proof He changes you while in it.
God made you to be you. Don't apologize for that fact. (Oh how long it took for me to let that truth sink in....). I've learned how precious His favor is and how real it is when you are looking to find purpose. I've learned that His favor is not something you can work for or earn, it's all Him. I've learned that some people will never be happy or positive, that's their problem not yours. Stay focused on what He has called you to do and know that in the end every battle, every ill word, every enemy will be taken care of by Him.
Words will still hurt, people will still be mean, and there will be times when you grip that shield of faith with both hands and say over and over I trust you God, I trust you. You are still moving forward. Freedom is that place where yes you may cry when you are left out of something, you may get upset when someone doesn't listen or says something unkind, but freedom is swallowing, taking a deep breath and realizing it is their loss not yours. Freedom is not letting the way other people act affect how you see yourself. Freedom is His voice being louder than theirs.
So my situation hasn't changed, in fact it's probably not getting better, but that's okay. There is a peace walking forward knowing He really has got this. There is a peace knowing how much He loves me and that NOTHING can change that. He knows my heart period and for that I am thankful.
If you do not have the new Bowling Family CD, GET IT!! It is so powerful and anointed and I'm not just saying that. It took my journey to a new place last week. The song I know Enough has been my theme since I first heard it. "I've been on the other side of the mountain, seen the night give way to day, delivered over and over when it seemed there was no way. I've been rescued by mercy, lifted by love. I may not know much, but I know enough." That is just a sample of the lyrics. Get it, I promise you it will be a blessing.
Different kind of blog I know, but it is where I've been the last week or so. No more people pleasing, playing the game, or doing things just so someone will notice. God is the only one who needs to notice, and He has never stopped paying attention. He knows my heart and His favor will protect even when I can't see. "I may not know much, but I know enough..." I've seen God move in miraculous ways and last week I was reminded that I'm not the same. I've been changed by an incredible relationship with the One who knows me the best and loves me the most!!
God gave you the light inside of you that makes you shine and sparkle. Guard the outlet and don't let anyone unplug it!!
On the journey,
~Melissa
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Darts, Knives, and Forgiveness
When you are doing what God has planned for your life, what He wants for you to do, rest assured you the enemy will come looking for you. This truth seeped into my mind a couple nights ago when I had finally had enough with a couple of situations that were just draining me. I had asked God more than once to fit the pieces together, but what I really wanted was for Him to fix the situations. I wanted Him to take out His big magic eraser and make them go away. I don't like being uncomfortable. I don't like being stretched. Oh, but see that's how we grow. (Like it or not, it is....). The sand has to get inside of our shells and its our choice if those things that are irritating turn into pearls or just stay as irritants.
So why did I use the term seep when I referred to the truth earlier. Seeping implies that it took time to get into my mind which it did. Like I said, I wanted Him to just make the situation get easier and comfortable. He wants me growing ;-)
So as I said earlier in a blog, He kept writing with this truth. Now on to why this is called Darts, Knives, and Forgiveness.
Darts: When you are where God wants you, the enemy is going to throw darts your way. His goal is to try and mess you up, throw you off course, and just plain distract you. What God showed me though, is as long as we keep our shield of faith up, the darts cannot affect us. It is when we take our eyes off of Him, start worrying about what comes next, spend time trying to figure out what is next, that we lower our shield of faith and get hit. Faith is not always knowing how the pieces fit together, but knowing and trusting the One who does. Faith doesn't fear, reason, or worry.
Knives: Knives in our back hurt. They just do, God knows that. If you read in Ephesians 6, there is a piece of armor to protect every part of our body except our back. If we are moving forward and following Him...our back is never exposed to the battle. It is when we get scared and start to turn around and run back that we end up with a knife in our back from someone. Knives are unexpected to us, but God knows before they hit. He will take the knife out and use that hurt to remind of us of His truth if we will let Him. Stay focused on the path He has planned for you. Stay focused on what He has called you to do. Look straight ahead and don't turn back. He has your back covered, if you keep moving forward.
Forgiveness: This truth came this morning. (I've heard it before, but it stuck this morning). Forgiveness is not for the other person. Forgiveness is for us. A lot of times, the hurt we feel, the hurt that caused the wall to be built around us is a hurt that the other person may not even know exists. If they do know they hurt you, chances are they have already moved forward anyway. If you hold on to the hurt, you stay put. Forgive that person and let go of the hurt. Forgiveness gives the hurt to God and lets Him do what only He can do. You can't run this race if you are tied to a hurt someone did to you. Move on....time is too short. (Word of caution: Forgiveness doesn't mean you continue to let that person hurt you. It means you follow His leading when interacting with that person. Please Him with your actions, interactions, words etc. He will protect your heart ;-)).
I heard this song last night for the first time. I'm still not sure how I had never heard it before, but I think God knew exactly when I needed the words. I've let the enemy make me feel guilty for having too big of a heart. I've let what others expected dictate way too much instead of following my heart. His box is the only One I was made to fit in, not the boxes others try to stuff me in to meet the their own needs/wants. No more apologizing for who He made me to be....My big heart is part of who I am;-) When I heard this song last night, God whispered this is you. Be who He made you to be!
Enjoy the journey!
Until next time
~Melissa
So why did I use the term seep when I referred to the truth earlier. Seeping implies that it took time to get into my mind which it did. Like I said, I wanted Him to just make the situation get easier and comfortable. He wants me growing ;-)
So as I said earlier in a blog, He kept writing with this truth. Now on to why this is called Darts, Knives, and Forgiveness.
Darts: When you are where God wants you, the enemy is going to throw darts your way. His goal is to try and mess you up, throw you off course, and just plain distract you. What God showed me though, is as long as we keep our shield of faith up, the darts cannot affect us. It is when we take our eyes off of Him, start worrying about what comes next, spend time trying to figure out what is next, that we lower our shield of faith and get hit. Faith is not always knowing how the pieces fit together, but knowing and trusting the One who does. Faith doesn't fear, reason, or worry.
Knives: Knives in our back hurt. They just do, God knows that. If you read in Ephesians 6, there is a piece of armor to protect every part of our body except our back. If we are moving forward and following Him...our back is never exposed to the battle. It is when we get scared and start to turn around and run back that we end up with a knife in our back from someone. Knives are unexpected to us, but God knows before they hit. He will take the knife out and use that hurt to remind of us of His truth if we will let Him. Stay focused on the path He has planned for you. Stay focused on what He has called you to do. Look straight ahead and don't turn back. He has your back covered, if you keep moving forward.
Forgiveness: This truth came this morning. (I've heard it before, but it stuck this morning). Forgiveness is not for the other person. Forgiveness is for us. A lot of times, the hurt we feel, the hurt that caused the wall to be built around us is a hurt that the other person may not even know exists. If they do know they hurt you, chances are they have already moved forward anyway. If you hold on to the hurt, you stay put. Forgive that person and let go of the hurt. Forgiveness gives the hurt to God and lets Him do what only He can do. You can't run this race if you are tied to a hurt someone did to you. Move on....time is too short. (Word of caution: Forgiveness doesn't mean you continue to let that person hurt you. It means you follow His leading when interacting with that person. Please Him with your actions, interactions, words etc. He will protect your heart ;-)).
I heard this song last night for the first time. I'm still not sure how I had never heard it before, but I think God knew exactly when I needed the words. I've let the enemy make me feel guilty for having too big of a heart. I've let what others expected dictate way too much instead of following my heart. His box is the only One I was made to fit in, not the boxes others try to stuff me in to meet the their own needs/wants. No more apologizing for who He made me to be....My big heart is part of who I am;-) When I heard this song last night, God whispered this is you. Be who He made you to be!
Until next time
~Melissa
Saturday, September 14, 2013
I feel like a failure
Don't let the title throw you off, read the whole thing...there is meat I promise.
So this week, this has been how I have "felt". I even told a few people that yesterday, that I felt like a failure with the way some things were going. WELL.....Only God would take my words and use them to teach a lesson only He could. So keep reading...as I said there is meat and not just venting.
Feelings will mess you up period. They just will and if you follow them they will mess you up even more. Feelings can be a good thing, but sometimes we have to do a feelings check. We have to look at what His word says and check our feelings with that. If the two line up, not a bad thing, but if they don't then follow His word. Now before you start beating yourself up because you have fallen and let feelings take lead, this takes TIME. When God wrote the verse about denying self and taking up our cross, I am pretty sure He had feelings in mind.
So when you get one of those feeling moments, what do you do? By no means have I arrived at perfecting this part yet, but I am pressing through it a lot quicker than I used to. So what do you do, well the quickest and easiest thing is to go God I feel this way, but I know you said__________. Be louder than my feelings. That's the quickest way, because then the feelings do not have time to take root. The next way is to take time to process that feeling. I have found that the busier you are, the harder it is to get slow down enough to put the feeling in its place. So process it if you must, but remember what He said and move forward. Hit the delete button on the feeling and quit replaying it. The more you replay it, the more it takes root. (Trust me, I know this all too well). If you will let Him though, He can dig the feeling up, bring healing, and give you what you need to smile and move on. One word of caution, He didn't say that you would never have another one of those feelings again, but He did say His word will never return void. Feelings may say you are one thing(and chances are they heard it from something someone said to you), but God says you are so much more.....
There are going to be days when you feel like a failure or feel like you have made a mess of things. Pay attention to your words. When you are saying I feel....remember it's not permanent. If you let it take root, it will turn into stress. If you can delete it, it turns into peace. Only God can take an impossible situation and remind you that you are Right where HE wants you to be. Stay focused, know the darts and knives are not a surprise to Him, and know that He doesn't see you as a failure.
So I took those words to Him yesterday and let Him take them as use them to write this blog. Circumstances may make you feel like a failure. Situations can cause you to feel like you have messed up. Other people can bleed you dry to where you don't feel like you have anything left to give, BUT God says I've got this just keep doing what you are doing. God knows your heart and why you do what you do. Make His to-do list, your to-do list and stay focused. The only way to not fail at something is to never do anything.
So yes, I felt like a failure yesterday. It's life and the situation/circumstances led to that. Am I failure? No, because I can look back on yesterday with His eyes and see how His heart came through even amidst the busy.
Different kind of blog, but I am trying to stay focused on the other side of the soap box. He is using this year and all that entails to make me more like Him. He's got this in so many ways!
Enjoy the journey,
Until next time ~Melissa
Next blog: When you are doing what God wants you to do, the knives and darts are going to come. It means you are making the enemy mad. He took this word that He gave me yesterday and painted picture. He continued writing on it last night. I'll type it out soon! Stay tuned!
So this week, this has been how I have "felt". I even told a few people that yesterday, that I felt like a failure with the way some things were going. WELL.....Only God would take my words and use them to teach a lesson only He could. So keep reading...as I said there is meat and not just venting.
Feelings will mess you up period. They just will and if you follow them they will mess you up even more. Feelings can be a good thing, but sometimes we have to do a feelings check. We have to look at what His word says and check our feelings with that. If the two line up, not a bad thing, but if they don't then follow His word. Now before you start beating yourself up because you have fallen and let feelings take lead, this takes TIME. When God wrote the verse about denying self and taking up our cross, I am pretty sure He had feelings in mind.
So when you get one of those feeling moments, what do you do? By no means have I arrived at perfecting this part yet, but I am pressing through it a lot quicker than I used to. So what do you do, well the quickest and easiest thing is to go God I feel this way, but I know you said__________. Be louder than my feelings. That's the quickest way, because then the feelings do not have time to take root. The next way is to take time to process that feeling. I have found that the busier you are, the harder it is to get slow down enough to put the feeling in its place. So process it if you must, but remember what He said and move forward. Hit the delete button on the feeling and quit replaying it. The more you replay it, the more it takes root. (Trust me, I know this all too well). If you will let Him though, He can dig the feeling up, bring healing, and give you what you need to smile and move on. One word of caution, He didn't say that you would never have another one of those feelings again, but He did say His word will never return void. Feelings may say you are one thing(and chances are they heard it from something someone said to you), but God says you are so much more.....
There are going to be days when you feel like a failure or feel like you have made a mess of things. Pay attention to your words. When you are saying I feel....remember it's not permanent. If you let it take root, it will turn into stress. If you can delete it, it turns into peace. Only God can take an impossible situation and remind you that you are Right where HE wants you to be. Stay focused, know the darts and knives are not a surprise to Him, and know that He doesn't see you as a failure.
So I took those words to Him yesterday and let Him take them as use them to write this blog. Circumstances may make you feel like a failure. Situations can cause you to feel like you have messed up. Other people can bleed you dry to where you don't feel like you have anything left to give, BUT God says I've got this just keep doing what you are doing. God knows your heart and why you do what you do. Make His to-do list, your to-do list and stay focused. The only way to not fail at something is to never do anything.
So yes, I felt like a failure yesterday. It's life and the situation/circumstances led to that. Am I failure? No, because I can look back on yesterday with His eyes and see how His heart came through even amidst the busy.
Different kind of blog, but I am trying to stay focused on the other side of the soap box. He is using this year and all that entails to make me more like Him. He's got this in so many ways!
Enjoy the journey,
Until next time ~Melissa
Next blog: When you are doing what God wants you to do, the knives and darts are going to come. It means you are making the enemy mad. He took this word that He gave me yesterday and painted picture. He continued writing on it last night. I'll type it out soon! Stay tuned!
Monday, September 9, 2013
Monday's meditations
In June, Monday and I may be friends again. For now, I'm learning from Monday yet again. God's been on me lately to follow through with a couple of things He has been asking me to do. It may seem little to us, but it is obedience. We take a step toward obedience and things fall in place that before looked like a mess. Obedience opens our eyes to see things through His eyes. Obedience today has given me peace that I honestly can't explain. It's made me see things from His perspective despite all of the negative around me. So 24 hours into the "next step" and I'm learning.............
Yesterday in church, we sang the song You are my all in all. I can't help when we sing that song but go back in time to my time at Madison Academy. That song just touches a place that unless you were there, it's hard to explain. Sweet memories.....and sweet times that's for sure. It made me appreciate what I have today and that time has made me the teacher I am today. I would not be the teacher I am today if not for that time. Tonight, mom and dad are watching NQC. Sweet memories God has brought back to me tonight. Oh how He has reminded me of just how incredible He is and how blessed I am. I am so thankful for the heart He has given me. I never realized until this afternoon when God started connecting the pieces, just how certain moments have prepared me to do what I do now. Thank you Lord for my really big heart. (Blog to come later: Apologizing for things that God made a special part of you.) It may not be on this side of heaven before you fully understand the depth of your reach and witness, but one day He will make all things clear. Continue to sow and follow His lead. Harvest time is coming soon.......
So yeah I've been thinking today and just taking a few moments to be thankful. I'm thankful for the amazing times God has shown out already in my life. For the foundation He gave me that He continues to build upon every day. For the friends He has blessed me with, who may as well be family. For the opportunities that only He could provide. For the ministry He has given me, even though it is still a work in progress.
I am thankful for those that look beyond what I can do and love me for who I am. I am thankful for those that know the real me, and sad for those that think they do. I am more than what I can do, it's just taken me awhile to finally appreciate that truth.
Different kind of blog I know, but I've been listening. More will come soon, I have this incredible feeling that the best is still to come. God is on the brink of moving like never before, He is just waiting for some of us to follow through with those little things He has asked of us, so He can do the big things we have asked of Him.
Enjoy the journey!
Until next time
~Melissa
Yesterday in church, we sang the song You are my all in all. I can't help when we sing that song but go back in time to my time at Madison Academy. That song just touches a place that unless you were there, it's hard to explain. Sweet memories.....and sweet times that's for sure. It made me appreciate what I have today and that time has made me the teacher I am today. I would not be the teacher I am today if not for that time. Tonight, mom and dad are watching NQC. Sweet memories God has brought back to me tonight. Oh how He has reminded me of just how incredible He is and how blessed I am. I am so thankful for the heart He has given me. I never realized until this afternoon when God started connecting the pieces, just how certain moments have prepared me to do what I do now. Thank you Lord for my really big heart. (Blog to come later: Apologizing for things that God made a special part of you.) It may not be on this side of heaven before you fully understand the depth of your reach and witness, but one day He will make all things clear. Continue to sow and follow His lead. Harvest time is coming soon.......
So yeah I've been thinking today and just taking a few moments to be thankful. I'm thankful for the amazing times God has shown out already in my life. For the foundation He gave me that He continues to build upon every day. For the friends He has blessed me with, who may as well be family. For the opportunities that only He could provide. For the ministry He has given me, even though it is still a work in progress.
I am thankful for those that look beyond what I can do and love me for who I am. I am thankful for those that know the real me, and sad for those that think they do. I am more than what I can do, it's just taken me awhile to finally appreciate that truth.
Different kind of blog I know, but I've been listening. More will come soon, I have this incredible feeling that the best is still to come. God is on the brink of moving like never before, He is just waiting for some of us to follow through with those little things He has asked of us, so He can do the big things we have asked of Him.
Enjoy the journey!
Until next time
~Melissa
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Revelation from the weekend....
Blog time ;-) If you are on my Facebook, this has to do with my status from Saturday. The first three weeks of school have been rough, I'll just be honest. Things are not going the way I planned for them to, the way I envisioned they would, or even the way I hoped they would. Last week was the first week I ran schedule and it wore me out. Those that know me, know my heart can be too big sometimes and I give way more than I should most days. I reached a point last week where I had given all I had left to give. You can give and give until you reach a point where you deplete what you have to give. Visual lesson: Last week I also learned how far I could go on my gas light. I learned that the so many miles to E go very quickly the closer it gets to E. I let my gas tank get the lowest it had ever gotten and God used it to teach me a lesson. I was like my gas tank last week. I ran myself down way lower than I should have. God gives us warnings for a reason just like gas lights and count downs that say how many miles to E. I have to pay attention better to both ;-)
So I went away this past weekend. Did I have paperwork I needed to stay home and do? Why yes, but I also knew if I didn't get away it would only get worse. I knew if I didn't have some me time and pour back into me, I would have nothing left to give. See I've quickly learned, a lot of people sadly will take, but very few actually give and make a deposit in you. When you find a friend that loves you for you and pours back into you, spend as much time as you can with those people. I am thankful for these precious ones in my life who mean more than they will ever know.
So the revelation took place on the way out of town Saturday and He wrote on it all weekend. So many times we think we are supposed to do it all because God will never give us more than we can handle. God will never give us more than we can handle, but people can and will if we let them. God's plans are for our good and not to harm us, but when we let others dictate our schedule, vie for our time, and keep us busy, we miss out on some incredible moments God has in store for us. We end up stressed, frustrated, and frankly overwhelmed when we take on what others want us to. So how do we draw the line? I'm still walking that out. I've let others dictate for so long and pile it on me(especially in the last three weeks), that it's going to take some time to step back and prioritize again. This is where faith comes in and trust. It takes both to keep walking forward and listening as He whispers which way to go and what to leave behind. In short, I have a strong feeling there will be more blogs coming from this revelation.
Know who you are and what He has called you to do. Let that purpose dictate your schedule. Love as much as you can, but remember to love yourself at the same time. He gave you gifts, you only need to receive them to use them(others don't have to approve or acknowledge). Words will hurt and the enemy knows which ones hurt you the most. So smile on the days when someone tells you aren't important(because you know you are). Keep doing what you do on the days when someone says you aren't a teacher(because you are in so many ways). Hold back the tears when someone says at least you are single and don't have a family(because they don't understand how your heart longs for a family to take care of). He has given you a purpose and has amazing plans in store for you. Hold tight to what your inner circle, those precious few that God has given to you who are there to speak in and mold you, and let the words of others come and go. God will take care of you and remember He doesn't like it when His children are mistreated. Thank Him for using the hurt to make you more like Him. Keep moving forward and stay focused, knowing that the God who kept you safe during the storms in your life thus far is walking you through this one as well. (Yep, sometimes God uses the bus wreck to help me keep things in perspectives...but that's another blog).
The battle does not define YOU!,
Until next time,
~Melissa
So I went away this past weekend. Did I have paperwork I needed to stay home and do? Why yes, but I also knew if I didn't get away it would only get worse. I knew if I didn't have some me time and pour back into me, I would have nothing left to give. See I've quickly learned, a lot of people sadly will take, but very few actually give and make a deposit in you. When you find a friend that loves you for you and pours back into you, spend as much time as you can with those people. I am thankful for these precious ones in my life who mean more than they will ever know.
So the revelation took place on the way out of town Saturday and He wrote on it all weekend. So many times we think we are supposed to do it all because God will never give us more than we can handle. God will never give us more than we can handle, but people can and will if we let them. God's plans are for our good and not to harm us, but when we let others dictate our schedule, vie for our time, and keep us busy, we miss out on some incredible moments God has in store for us. We end up stressed, frustrated, and frankly overwhelmed when we take on what others want us to. So how do we draw the line? I'm still walking that out. I've let others dictate for so long and pile it on me(especially in the last three weeks), that it's going to take some time to step back and prioritize again. This is where faith comes in and trust. It takes both to keep walking forward and listening as He whispers which way to go and what to leave behind. In short, I have a strong feeling there will be more blogs coming from this revelation.
Know who you are and what He has called you to do. Let that purpose dictate your schedule. Love as much as you can, but remember to love yourself at the same time. He gave you gifts, you only need to receive them to use them(others don't have to approve or acknowledge). Words will hurt and the enemy knows which ones hurt you the most. So smile on the days when someone tells you aren't important(because you know you are). Keep doing what you do on the days when someone says you aren't a teacher(because you are in so many ways). Hold back the tears when someone says at least you are single and don't have a family(because they don't understand how your heart longs for a family to take care of). He has given you a purpose and has amazing plans in store for you. Hold tight to what your inner circle, those precious few that God has given to you who are there to speak in and mold you, and let the words of others come and go. God will take care of you and remember He doesn't like it when His children are mistreated. Thank Him for using the hurt to make you more like Him. Keep moving forward and stay focused, knowing that the God who kept you safe during the storms in your life thus far is walking you through this one as well. (Yep, sometimes God uses the bus wreck to help me keep things in perspectives...but that's another blog).
The battle does not define YOU!,
Until next time,
~Melissa
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