Celebrate you!

In my longest I can not remember looking at a picture and not criticizing myself. I have always been big and a heavy girl. ( I refuse to use the F word). I was blessed to go to a high school were my size wasn't an issue. I had friends who loved me for me. I had people that loved me for me and that's all that mattered. I had grown up with most of these people, so I think at that point they just saw me for me. When I got into college and into the work force, I quickly realized size mattered. It shouldn't, but people judge you based on what they see first and then they may take the time to get to know you. I took a lot of what other people thought personally(way too personally) and it started to affect my self image. I couldn't look at a picture and not see myself the way others saw me, until..........

Until God started revealing how He saw me.....When you grasp how God sees you, I mean truly grasp how He sees you, it is FREEDOM. I finally asked Him one day to let me see myself even in the mirror, as He saw me....God says we have not because we ask not, so ask! He was faithful to answer.

So many times we put off things while waiting for that special day. We find ourselves saying, oh I'll do that when I get married or I'll do that when I have a family. Well guess what....everyday is special. Everyday is a gift from God and we should celebrate it. So that being said, I decided I wanted some pictures. It had been 14 years since I had Senior pictures done and it was time for some pictures(that were not taken with a phone). I had kept putting it off because in my mind I kept saying that's what I'll do when I get engaged, married, and start a family. Well I'm almost 32 and that day hasn't happened yet. I was tired of letting what was traditional or expected get stuck in the waiting game box. I wanted a day to feel special, to be that princess for a day, and to simply celebrate me.  (We ALL need a day like that. We all need a day when we just celebrate the me He made us to be and not the me that others tend to make us be).

So I contacted my friend Karen and set up a photography session. Tonight I got to see the pictures and I had tears in my eyes. For the first time since I can remember, I saw myself as pretty. I saw myself as not heavy. I could see myself as He sees me.  It's hard to put into words how freeing that is. The best way to be would be to quote Tasha Cobb's song "I hear those chains falling". I heard chains falling tonight.

Don't put off something just because you are waiting for that special day. God made you who you are for a reason. You are who you are for a reason. You are complete just the way you are. I think too times we can't see ourselves in that light because we keep looking for something that is going to make us complete, to make us whole. God does that when we let Him in every little area of our lives. Too many times we give Him our "this' , but hold on to our "that's". God knows how to handle our this and our that. He just needs us to pry our fingers from around them and let go. Letting go means releasing it into His hands and not trying to grab it back. (That's a blog for another day).

Celebrate you! Not the you others think you should be, but the you He made you to be. When you know who you are in Him, you can do what needs to be done and know that He will shine your heart through regardless of the task.

Smiling on the journey,
~Melissa