My heart for a moment...

This was a blog I knew I had to write, but I didn't want to write anytime soon. Well in the middle of service this morning, God was pretty clear and said it's time. It's time to tell more of where I've brought you from so that others will know. The only thing that keeps me typing this other than He said to, is the hope that someone else will see a part of it and see themselves. God is pouring out even now on His children.

The mountain is real, the mountain is large, and the mountain is huge. God doesn't always move the mountain. Sometimes He lets you circle it around, around, and around again until you at some point get desperate enough to go God help. So many times we pray and ask God to move, but we don't take a minute to sit and listen. We get so busy doing things for God that we forget to sit down and spend some time with Him. We are so focused on what others are telling us to do and who others have told us to be, that we neglect who He has called us to be. We have allowed well meaning people to put the locks on chains that the enemy handed us or to put a box around us. I'm done with that. I'm done with the chains that kept me trying to play a role that someone else dictated. We are too quick in the church to put labels on people before we get to know their hearts. We are took quick to say oh you are such and such you can do this, or you are such and such you can do that. God came to set us free, but before you can realize freedom is in your reach you have to get rid of the chains that are still holding you back. So many times we think of chains as addictions, as past mistakes, and "sins" as we so lovingly like to call them. Oh my...that's why so many are still in chains. Anything that the enemy can use to keep you from being who God has called you to be is a chain, Stay with me for a minute....so many times we don't pay attention to some of the chains from past hurts that led to bitterness or fear. Those are the chains that keep us from walking forward into our God given destiny. At some point we can only go so far, before we feel those chains. You can still be a Christian living for Him and have chains around your ankles. (See my earlier post on the saved life vs. the abundant life).

For too long we have plucked the blooms of bitterness, resentment, hurt, fear, anxiety etc. and laid them at His feet. That works for a time, but blooms grow back. Freedom comes when we get to the root of that hurt, tell God how we felt during the moment (He already knows anyway), and then we give that hurt to Him. When the hurt is in His hands, the enemy can't use it against you. As long as you are still proudly wearing it as a scar of what something or someone did to you the enemy has control on it. Oh but listen, a hurt, a disappointment put in the hands of the Master can unlock a chain that NO ONE can lock back. So if you have walked forward and all of a sudden feel stuck, ask God to reveal if you have any chains holding you back. I know I personally thought I had dealt with everything, but what I had done was pick the blooms and I still needed to dig up the roots. You can't stuff down feelings and emotions and not expect a root of something to grow. God understands how you feel, let Him handle what blooms from it.

For me I knew there was an anointing, a calling on my life for at least the last five years. The bus wreck taught me that, although it took me five years to see it. It took me five years after that day to finally be able to grab a hold of the anointing and calling that I knew He had for me. Why did it take so long? I had to deal with some other stuff first. I had to deal with the anxiety, the fear, and the borderline depression at times that I had stuffed down over the years. One too many pity parties and comparing yourself with someone else can lead to some roots that you don't want in your life. I had to finally come to terms with who He had made me to be and know that was the only person I had to live up to. I also had a chain of tradition that had to be broken off. I had been raised to where women didn't do much but plan fellowships and take care of the kids. Single women really didn't do a whole lot because most of the ministries were for couples. God has equipped every child of His with a work to do. The season you are in is not a surprise to Him, your obedience though will determine how well you enjoy that season. God didn't make you to fit in a box, quit letting other people put you in it. When we let God work in our everyday life and not just in certain portions, there is a freedom unlocked that creates the peace that passes all understanding. God didn't give you the gift of a prayer language for you to only use it around certain people. (That's a blog for another day). I was walking in the abundant life with one area of my life and dragging the chains around the other. I had listened to the voice of tradition way too long. Thank you Jesus for healing and chains broken.... Now when the people pleasing voice of the enemy starts telling me what I can and cannot do, I remind him who has already won and that he is defeated in the name of Jesus.

Healing happens when we let God take off the band-aid and apply His medicine. When you get to the point in your walk with Him, where you are desperate enough, hungry enough you find Him or He finds you. You may feel like your feet are glued to the floor, and they probably are in your mind, but God is working from the soles of your feet to to the top of your head. God is moving and turning things around, if you will just simply let go. He never meant for the chains of the past, the fear and anxiety to keep you in bondage, He died for you to have an abundant life. Shake loose and walk in it today! Hear my heart when I say, there is freedom in the release. There is a fire that He will pour into you that you can't help but share it with other people. I've felt like Jeremiah the last two months, it's a fire shut up in my bones if I don't tell it. (Thankful for the blog to be able to tell it). Different kind of blog today, but I pray you heard my heart...

Smack there's a wall.......

What do you do when the tank is empty, the give is give out, and the sponge is dry? What do you do when you stop and feel an ouch....yep, there's a wall right there. What do you do? Do you just sit and stay put in the pity party? Do you fight the feeling of blah and bleh? Do you worry and fret about what you can't change? Do you remember where the real battle lies and who the real enemy is? The battle isn't going to end just because you feel overwhelmed or because you keep fighting. The times we live in are an indicator that the battle is here to stay. So what do you do when you hit the wall? It's going to happen to all of us at some point. For me, my wall came this afternoon. My give out is gave out, my sponge is drier than dry, and my tank was on empty by 9:00 this morning. I've noticed that when hit the wall, it's almost a given that the discouragement, self-pity, and doubt start to set in. The enemy knows how to wear a saint out, God told us that in His word. So again the question is What do you do? 

Well meaning friends will tell you the traditional things to say, "don't let this bother you", "God's got this", "He said you can do it", "it will all be okay, etc. " I've found myself saying these to other people at times myself, Lord forgive me for that. We run to them sometimes, because know we need to speak positive and because let's be honest....we've grown up this way. We say God's got it, but have we asked Him? Stay with me for a minute....

I believe Jesus may have felt overwhelmed at times. The needs of the people, the wants of the masses, at times they had to take a toll on Him. He needed rest and times by Himself. He needed time to just get away, to talk to His Father. He needed time to let the One who knew Him the best fill Him back up. Jesus knew that He had to be about His Father's business. In other words, He needed to stay focused on the mission God had called Him to do. He couldn't taken on anything else or deal with anything else but doing what God had called Him to do at that time. His human side wanted to do it all, but His God side knew He had a purpose. His human side felt, but His God side knew. 

So smack there's a wall....what do you do? That would be the question I asked Him this afternoon. I knew the wall was there, I knew there was a choice to be made. I also knew that my give out was tired, and I was feeling drained. (Oh that lying enemy loves that moment). On the other side of the wall was the next part of the journey with God, but I had to get over the wall first. I thought about coming home and going to my "war spot", but it just didn't feel right yet. I thought about coming home and just going to sleep, but that wasn't it either. With every God truth that started being spoke in my Spirit, I knew God was fighting the battle. I had to get still which meant I had to get quiet. I have learned over the last couple of months, for every battle there is a word. The enemy fights when he is scared of the word, deed, love that is about to come out of you. The enemy fights when you know your purpose and what God has called you to do. 

With the stillness came the word ask, God knew I was at the wall, it wasn't a surprise to Him. He also knew that I had a choice to make. He wasn't going to just move this particular wall or give me the boost over without the word. So many times we find ourselves at the wall, but instead of Him for help over, we sit and dig in and pray for God to move the wall. God's waiting to give us the boost we need to go up and over the wall, but He wants us to ask Him. Quit staring at the wall and start asking Him for help over it. The wall isn't a surprise to God and probably not to you(I know I could see mine coming). God has been pouring out more than I could imagine over the last couple of weeks. (That blog is coming soon..) The battle has been raging and the wall is all a part of the plan. The enemy wants to let it distract you, but with God's help you can scale that wall. (Psalms 18:29). Don't decorate the wall and and make it personal, God wants you up and over He has more for you to do. 

God I speak life over the readers right now. For those that have found themselves smack against a wall today, I pray they see your hand outstretched. You are longing to not only give them a hand, but a boost over the wall and onto the next part of the journey. God nudge them, whisper to them, let them know what you have prepared on the other side. What the enemy meant for evil, You are working for their good. God I pray that You fill them with your peace and truth right now, give rest to the weary and reveal the good. In the Name of Jesus...Amen 

The Waters are stirring...

The man lay by the pool of Bethesda waiting on the waters to stir. The man was waiting on his healing, he was waiting on the waters to stir so he could be restored. He could have laid there forever waiting on someone to help him get to the pool, that is until Jesus passed by. He made excuses as to why he would couldn't move to get there. Let that sink in...He made excuses to Jesus as to why he couldn't move. Oh my how many times do we make excuses because we can't (or won't) move when He asks us to. The man was content to just sit there and wait on someone. Are you content to just sit there and wait on someone else to get you to the water? How close are you to your water, but you just can't seem to get to the water in time? Do you think the man was staring at the water to see when it started stirring or was he waiting on someone else to tell him when to jump in? 

The waters are stirring right now. We are living in a Joel 2:28 season where God is pouring out His Spirit in abundance to those that are seeking and are hungering after Him. He's pouring it out already. It's not a time that's coming, it's here. Are you sitting by the pool waiting on a pastor or leader to lead you to the water for your healing or miracle? Are you making excuses to Jesus when He asks why you are still sitting there? The waters are stirring....don't just wade in, jump in. He longs to not just fill you up, but to have you overflowing and ready to pour out to others. He longs for a people who will not just wait on someone to lead them to the water, but will take a step and move on their own. Get moving....the power is yours for the taking. Are you going to grab it or wait for someone to hand it to you? Tradition won't get you to the waters, Religion won't get you to the waters, but a desperate, a longing for more of Him will get you there. He longs to restore to you what the enemy has taken from you. He longs to heal your heart and to bring you back to Him. He longs for you to love Him as much as you love the other things you seek after. He longs for you.

The waters are stirring, boldness, obedience, and a fire that cannot be quenched is yours for the grabbing. Ask Him for it today....and then when He says jump in...do it. 

The war has already started, God's leading the charge. Armor up, solider. 

Tuesday Truths volume 6

Tuesday truths this week are taken from Exodus 33. This passage of scripture has become one of my favorites. I actually read it for the first time after the bus wreck five years ago. Verse 22 became a picture for me of that day. God had us in the cleft of His rock that day and covered by His hand for sure. Verse 17 has become a life verse and one that I have stood on when the enemy comes in with his lies. Now understand sometimes I have to deal with the question of Are you pleased with me Lord? (So thankful for a friend who spoke that word a few weeks ago), but once we know that it leads to the first part. The last part is something that never changes on God's part. How many times though do we call ourselves by something other than what He calls us? Verse 16 asks a question that we all need to ask ourselves. The only thing that will make us stand out(and remember we are called to be separate from this world) is His presence going with us. 

12 Moses said to the Lord, “You have been telling me, ‘Lead these people,’ but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. You have said, ‘I know you by name and you have found favor with me.’ 13 If you are pleased with me, teach me your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you. Remember that this nation is your people.”

14 The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

15 Then Moses said to him, “If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. 16 How will anyone know that you are pleased with me and with your people unless you go with us? What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?”

17 And the Lord said to Moses, “I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name.”

18 Then Moses said, “Now show me your glory.”

19 And the Lord said, “I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. 20 But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live.”

21 Then the Lord said, “There is a place near me where you may stand on a rock. 22 When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. 23 Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back; but my face must not be seen.”

The saved life vs. the abundant life

I've been sitting on this blog for weeks. Not because I didn't want to write it, but because God wasn't finished writing it. This has been my journey over the last couple of months in a nutshell. I've spent years of my life in the saved life portion. I've had moments of the abundant life throughout the saved life, but could never get that part to stay put. Stay with me for a minute....the saved life happens when a person accepts God's gift of salvation. The abundant life happens when you finally get it. You understand the power that is within you and you tap into it. Too many know that they have a power on the inside, but busyness gets in the way. They know the power exists, but they don't tap into it for fear of what someone else will think. Sadly there is also a group of Christians that know the power exists, but have no idea how to tap into it. It's not always taught in churches or preached from pulpits. That's why there are many Christians today still struggling with the same thing they have given to God over and over and over again. They know how to leave it at the altar on Sunday, but have no idea how to resist or rebuke the enemy when he throws it back at them on Monday. Saved life vs. Abundant Life.....

One tells you that you are going to heaven and the other helps you live with peace on this side of heaven. The enemy is on the prowl....he's perfectly content with a saved Christian, but it's when that Christian finds their way to a prayer closet, to the word on a daily basis, and when they grasp a hold of their purpose and anointing...he gets scared. I'm okay with that....(and God about shouted I'm sure and said Finally). See a couple of weeks ago...three days into my altar time with Him. Three days into having my place where I met with Him(not just in the car etc.), but a regular place....God whispered are you ready? Well let's get real for a minute. That could be a scary whisper...but fear didn't answer that night faith did with a yes. That was the night I grabbed a hold of the anointing for myself. I knew it was there, but I had to believe it for myself. More on that in another blog....I was raised that the anointing was for a few. I was raised where we didn't really use the word anointing for fear it might scare someone. I know several who are still scared to speak that word now, but I've come too far for you to tell me it's not real. I've come too far for you to tell me it's for a certain group of people or even a certain gender. The anointing is what breaks chains, changes lives, and keeps you from running backwards when the fire feels too hot.

The saved life is the start to the journey, but oh my hear my heart when I say don't let that be the end of the journey. The abundant life is how you survive the walk. It's how you push through those moments when your world seems to be crashing, but you know God's still holding it all together. It's how you can walk forward and be who He has called you to be, even though it may not make sense to anyone around you.

My tired is tired

25And he shall speak great words against the most High, and shall wear out the saints of the most High, and think to change times and laws: and they shall be given into his hand until a time and times and the dividing of time  (Daniel 7:25, KJV)

This week has worn me out physically. I could sleep all weekend and I'm not sure I would "feel" caught up. It has been a long week, and I am thankful for a long weekend. These kinds of feelings before would have made me think of having a pity party blog, but God keeps whispering things in the natural reflect things in the spiritual. So I was like God how so? To me I don't "feel" tired spiritually...actually the opposite. The fire I have right now is what keeps me going most days. There is some how a peace knowing He's taking are of things even when it may not "feel" like it.

I started this on Thursday and had to go plug my laptop in to charge before I could finish. God woke me up and said it's time to finish it this morning. I'm still tired, but my focus has changed.  I'm tired of the enemy taking my energy. I'm tired of the enemy attempting to take my joy, my peace, and my confidence. I'm tired of the distractions from the enemy being so loud. At some point, that liar will realize that I know how to fight. Things that used to bother me, lead me to praying more. Things that used to make me hesitant, now make me run to His throne. My prayer time has increased and the line for battle has been drawn. I was preparing for war before seeing the movie War Room, but after the movie...lets just say the war cry is loud and clear.

It's time to go to battle for those that we love, those that we like, and even those we haven't even met. It's time for those that have heard the call to answer it and to walk out that calling. I am notorious for leaving my cell phone on silent. I have way too many things that ding or "notify" me of updates or messages that I typically just leave it on silent. I've also learned to ignore the light, but I digress. God started using my phone as a visual this week. Unless I'm looking straight at the phone, I may miss a call if it's on silent. Is your God phone on silent? Are you looking at it expecting, anticipating an answer to the prayer, the request you have made? or Are you just going about your business and if you miss it you miss it, you can always "call" back later? Oh reader don't miss the call. Turn the volume up if you need to, but be expecting when you ask Him in prayer. Be waiting when you ask Him believing He is going to do it. Ask, Believe, Expect.....the answer is coming.

The distractions have been plentiful this week. It would take multiple blogs to go through them all in detail, but let's just say the enemy has been on the move. Prayer is the only way church that we can stay steps ahead of his schemes. Spiritual warfare is real and the enemy knows who believes that and who doesn't. Find a prayer closet/spot and use it...it's not about these quick little prayers of blessing the food right now that are going to hit the enemy where it hurts. It's the prayers of God to move that mountain that is in someone's way, the prayer of pleading the blood over a house hold, the prayer of asking the angels to surround a place,...it's those prayers that are leading the army into battle. The distractions will always be there, but my time with God tells me that those distractions are a compliment. The enemy is pulling out the darts to keep you from that word God is bringing forth. If the enemy can keep you distracted with whatever else is going on in your world, then you may miss the call for that answer you are waiting to hear. Distractions have been everywhere and from places I must admit I didn't see coming. God did though....discernment has been priceless this week in knowing what was a distraction and what was not.

Tired is possible in every sense, physically, mentally, emotionally, and even spiritually. Things in the natural really do reflect things in the spiritual. Tired is something He can use if you let Him. He provides rest for the weary, strength for the journey, joy despite the tears, and a renewed calling each day. Check your feelings when you do become tired. Don't let the enemy get a foot hold in, but instead claim that strength and promise that says you can soar on wings like eagles, the promise that says you may be struck down, but not destroyed, and the promise that reminds you the One who called you is faithful and He will do it.

Tuesday Truths vol. 5

Truths this week are from 1 Corinthians 2

3I came to you in weakness with great fear and trembling. 4 My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power, 5 so that your faith might not rest on human wisdom, but on God’s power.

God equips the called, He doesn't call the equip. I've heard that saying for years and God brought it to mind again while reading this passage. So many times that "thing" we feel we just couldn't do is the very thing God had planned for us to do all along. I've learned the hard way, don't ever tell God you aren't going to do something and definitely do not pray for it ;-) 

14 The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit. 15 The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments,

I had to read this passage twice. The second time around I was like Thank you Lord for revelation...I dated this verse. For the last couple of months, I have had a difficult explaining what God had been doing in this journey with Him. I actually wrote out..."That's why it's hard to explain it to someone else!". I've often wondered if someone thought I was crazy when I tried to describe what God was doing in my life. I'm so thankful for friends who have walked the same journey, were there in the moment, and know I'm not crazy, just Spirit filled. So many times the things God reveals to us, the places He takes us, the time spent in His presence....unless that other person was there with us or has experienced it before...words do not always convey the moment. Discernment is a precious priceless gift for children of the Most High. Use it wisely, carry it with care, and know that He gave it to you for a reason.